Granted I haven’t kept up with comic books since I was kid, and that was 50 years ago. But the Spider-Man portrayed in the movies is not the Spider-Man I remember at all. The one I remember was an extremely smart geek with a sarcastic wit. Not the dork portrayed by Tobey Maguire in the first three Spider-Man movies, who had webs coming out of his wrists instead of wrist-mounted “web-shooter” devices. Hell, they didn’t even get that right. 

And it certainly wasn’t the Spider-Man portrayed by Tom Holland who seems to have a boy crush on Iron Man, and becomes completely dependent on Iron Man to provide any upgrades in tech. Any kid capable of creating webbing and web-shooters does not need Iron Man to design him a suit. And the real Spider-Man certainly would not be following Iron Man around like a love-sick puppy.  About the only thing they did get right with the new incarnation portrayed by Tom Holland, and it took till the movie Captain America Civil War, was that Spider-Man certainly wouldn’t have much problem handling most of the Avengers. In fact, Peter Parker once told Mary Jane he could defeat the HULK, but he’d have to kill him; and when Spider-Man was told to deliver the HULK to the Avengers, he staggered the HULK with a punch, had him down, and wrapped in webbing, but then had an attack of conscience which allowed the HULK time to recover. That being said I doubt Spider-Man, who has taken on the HULK, would have too many problems defeating most Avengers. Spider-Man’s major downfall is that he’s not bullet resistant, bullets don’t bounce off him like they do the HULK or Thor, and he doesn’t have armor like Iron Man or War Machine, and you can’t elude them all when there’s hundreds coming at you from all directions, so it would be fairly easy to kill Spider-Man if you could get him in a kill zone with a bunch of machine guns pointed in his general direction.

The best Spider-Man movies were the ones with Andrew Garfield. And the return to the self-made web-shooters of the comic book Spider-Man. They even tried various versions of the costume leading up to the movie to reach something that Peter Parker might make himself, as opposed to being made for him. But even this version seemed off the mark. Maybe it’s because of the people creating the movies, maybe they’re just too old, or out of touch, and can’t relate to a teenager. Maybe one day they’ll get it right.

( image courtesy of thetazzone.com )

 

By admin

Former Freehand Freelance Graphic Illustrator... been online since 2004 ( late starter ), blogging since 2005, presently writing a suspense-thriller e-book that began as a screenplay.

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